Thailand Guide

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Massage

Have you ever wanted to engage in light BDSM with a tiny wiry asian woman? Then it’s your lucky day. Lanta is overrun by massage places and most of them are good. Thai massage is a lot like sports massage but with chiropractic and muay thai elements. They will prod you, twist you, walk on you, elbow you, crack your bones. Make the noise! I live for the noise! BWAHAHA! In short, it’s pretty awesome. A good thai massage will give a good run through, none of that light caressing stuff. That being said, tell them in advance if you want it a bit harder, they might be used to soft farangs screaming too much. If you’re a real softie go for an oil massage, they will still be rough but at least your slippery.

The normal thai massage goes for around 250-350 baht. 500 for a fancy one. If you’re going for a late massage at the beach it’s a good idea to pick a place with a mosquito net. Dreamy spa is a great more professional spa that’s not on the beach. My favorite is Jai Dee massage that’s part of Lanta Castaway/Beachcomber Bar, buy tickets in the reception area. Don Spa Ya is also recommended. They have one shop on the main road close before 7/11 and one shop directly at the beach, next to Korner bar.

If they take your pants off and put a towel over your eyes then it’s a good sign. Speaking of pants, some will want you to take your shorts off, some leave them on, if you’re going commando you’re in the wrong kind of massage place. Choose something loose and stretchy.

For you guys there might be some proximity play in the ball yard so align your units before you start.

The sequence of a thai massage is usually you’ll lie down on your stomach, they’ll start with your back and legs, moving from one side to each other. Then they’ll flip you over onto your back (This is often indicated by hitting you rapidly a few times on your back). They’ll go over your legs again, your shoulders and neck. They’ll crack your toes and hands. I live for the noise! Then you’ll sit up and they’ll do your shoulders and scalp (which is bliss). They do a move I call picking up the lice and then probably a series of quick hits and snapping to indicate that your done.

Oh, one last thing, thai massage do sometimes include corrections, which entails twisting you into yoga like positions for the clicky sound. Most of these are great, but there is a half-nelson twist your neck thing they sometimes want to do that I’d stay away from

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